Sunday, January 4, 2009

UNrequited.

I first heard the term "unrequited" when I was 13.
I had fallen in LOVE, for the very first time.

He was quite a bit older than I was....and I'm not exaggerating. I was 13; he was 29.
Obviously, that was a love that never came to fruition. Thank god.

Which brings me to my current issue..on-going now for, oh...almost 10 YEARS.
I was 19. I met this person quite by accident. I was in a committed relationship with someone else. Needless to say, that didn't last. This person overwhelmed me completely. In every sense of the word. I never saw him coming.
I am still hooked on this one man. One man who....is in my past, and will never be a part of my present. Or future.
Yet, he is always in my thoughts. I have to wonder why? Possibly because he was the "one" I felt that "got away"? The one that I measured, compared & held up every man to, since we met? The one that I dreamed of as a little girl...my "dream man" in the flesh.

No matter how much I might have "known" him at one time - you can never REALLY, fully KNOW someone completely.
He is not who I thought he was. Yet, he was the ONE for me..in these last 10 years. It scares me to think, if this man, who I thought the moon rose & set on, isn't what he seemed and was too good to be true; what hope is there for the rest of them?
Things to ponder.....

3 comments:

~*~ amanda ~*~ said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
~*~ amanda ~*~ said...

Oh dearie, most things that are too good to be true are. That doesn't mean that things that seem to be great aren't REAL. This guy was maybe right for you at the time, and the way you two fit together at that intersection of your life made you feel whole. Now, though, you are different and he is different... maybe you two aren't fitted for each other at this time. One thing I can say is: don't settle! You're a beautiful, strong, independent, charming woman and any man would be lucky to have you!

Roxi Sweetheart said...

Well, from first hand knowledge of this "lustfullness" with this guy.
What I can say to you about it is this.
You didn't fully know him at the time, although your impression of him was that he was unique. I think it was a crush that went bonkers because yes indeed he came across as the epitomy of what you thought you wanted in a man at the time.
I think its exactly the whole "what could have been" thing.
And, simply there IS HOPE for other men out there because #1 you will get to KNOW them before falling head over heels in love and later being disappointed;)

I believe that you and I enjoy the "fantasy" idea. We wanted that as children and then hey, he fit the bill AT THAT TIME. So, it was a dream...a dream that you didn't want to end!
But then when you realized it was just that you felt let down?

Just realize this...that no man is "perfect" in any way. BUT, once you find the right man that is someone who is your best friend and confidant...you'll see that its not perfection or a dream that your looking for...it compatibility, excitement and attraction....most of all someone who will help you to go further in life and strive for more...that is what you really want! xox