Saturday, September 10, 2011

Bohemianism, Fighting Back & An Update.


Lately life has become sparkly, shiny and new again.

After trudging through the murkiness of depression, personal and legal battles, ungeniune friends, laziness and lackluster ambitions (on my part) not to mention the humdrum daily life "stuff"; I have started to come out the other side.

"The only way to deal with an unfree world is to become so absolutely free that your very existence is an act of rebellion." -Albert Camus
The uneccessary excess has been cut and I only have time, room, energy and passion for the good kind of excess - "...being drunk on words, paintings, carvings, plays, love affairs, travel, meditation, olives, cypress trees, everydayness, movie images, sounds, naked flesh, all nighters." ~ excerpt from "Bohemian Manifesto"

Fighting Back:

With that being said, I hope people can realize that this is a new girl standing (errr, writing) before you.
I have a backbone. I have some fiery-ness. I am not the doormat, the punching bag, the sickeningly sweet or passive girl you once knew.

You've been warned.


And what about the past year? 2011 has been a bitch, plain and simple. But then again, so have the previous 2 years.

I've just been in a personal R-U-T. I start to recognize the pattern usually once it's too late. Every couple of years something absurd and awful happens to me......I lose myself. I start to fall victim to pleasing others. I begin to act like a simpering, brain dead, mainstream little ninny and let anyone and everyone treat me like garbage. It doesn't matter if its a boyfriend, a girlfriend or a family member.

I roll over and play dead.

But, then something else begins to happen and I get re-charged, fired up and I always come out swinging.

So, what's been going on?

* I am still single. Yeah, imagine that. And, happy. I may not have a man and I may not be a supermodel but I am pretty bad ass.

* My daughter is super-fricking-awesome. No contest. She just is. I can't wait to see her take on the world.

* I have finally realized that life is more than a) being popular, b) being rich or c) being "normal." Actually, I feel sorry for anyone who are those things. Well, not the being rich one. I'd take that ANYDAY.

* School, travel, a new home, writing, psychology, true love and a few other things are still VERY much a part of my present and future. Lucky me =)

Until next a forger, a maverick, a renaissance (wo)man and make some new trails. Be true to YOU and blaze over anyone or thing that stands in your way!!!

"And these children that you spit on, as they try to change their worlds, are immune to your consultations. They're quite aware of what they're goin' through." - David Bowie

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